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Find out the sweaty symptoms and what you can do about it!
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Teddy: And now an important message from Lady Brain…\
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Lauren: Summer’s here and that means warm weather, lightweight clothing and sweat – LOTS OF IT. \
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Steph: Do you hesitate to pull on those lightweight khakis for fear that the two-hour sales meeting will cause you break out in such a crotch sweat your co-workers will think you’ve peed your pants?\
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Lauren: If warm, summer weather makes you sweat in not-so-convenient places like the crack of your behind, crotchal region or nads then you’re no stranger to “SWANUS.”\
Steph: Swanus is a term used to describe the sweat that builds in the crack of one’s ass and then drips, or in some cases, pours down the chute to the crotch, thereby leaving a wet spot on one’s pants or the back one’s skirt.\
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Lauren: The principles of Swanus can also apply to other areas of the body, such as the front crotch and the breasts. It’s hideous and embarrassing, but we here at Lady Brain offer the following solutions to reduce the chances of Swanus ruining your day, or worse, your best silk dress.\
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Steph: Step 1) Immediately after drying your freshly washed bod, always powder your buns and, ;, don’t forget your package. Powder, or corn starch, will aid in preventing the dreaded “Bat Wing.”\
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Lauren: Step 2) Carefully consider your wardrobe choices and think about where you’ll be sitting on very hot days. Ladies should simply rule out light colored silk bottoms if the temperature is over 75 degrees. There’s nothing grosser than mistaking Swanus for another type of leak.\
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Steph: And, folks don’t wear the tan, cotton trousers if you’re taking a lunch meeting at a restaurant with poor ventilation or outdoor seating. \
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Lauren: Take our advice or you’re sure to be sitting in a pool of your own Swanus stew! Ew!\
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Steph: Finally, wear underwear, mini pads or rubber pants beneath your clothes. They can help stop Swanus from becoming obvious to those around even if you’re swimming it.\
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Teddy: The preceding was an important message from Lady Brain.
